Desperate, Chapter 1

Chapter 1, of Desperate, entitled: "Ideals and Going Under" was good for me to hear.

The chapter opens with Sarah Mae sharing what she thought mothering would be like.  If you can picture June Cleaver, then you can probably imagine the type of ideals Sarah had.

And, to be honest with you, my first thought was: "Who thinks that way?"  Who thinks they can have a hot breakfast every morning, dressed in your best, and a chipper attitude every single day?

Then, I realized, that even though my ideals didn't included having my pearls on, they are just as unreachable.
I still tend to think I can run my house on a schedule, regardless of how many times it's not worked.  Up at 5am, exercise, shower and dress, devotions and an hour of work done before the kids wake up at 8am for their pre-planned (not necessarily hot!) breakfast, and out the door by 9am to do an errand or two before our daily play date.  Oh, did I mention that somewhere in there I would have gotten lunch prepped too so that when we arrive back home at 11am, we can have lunch before the kids go down for naps?

If that doesn't seem unattainable to you, please do not comment.  Cause, in my house, with two very curious, energetic boys -- it never happens.  And, I'm now content knowing that it's not realistic.  PLEASE do not burst my bubble! :)

So, where's the hope?  Chapter 1 goes on to remind us young moms that the hope is in God.  If we can view mothering as our highest calling -- a very worthy, though tough, pursuit -- then we can forget the impossible ideals, and cling to the One who is changing us through these struggles.

So good.  Can't wait to get a chance to read Chapter 2.

In the mean time, co-author Sally blogged about this chapter over at I take Joy.

She posed some additional questions, including:

What are your biggest disappointments over how you expected yourself to be as a mom compared to your reality?
Oh man, oh man.  I thought I would NEVER struggle to truly enjoy my kids.  That I would ALWAYS want to stop what I was doing to read that same book 10 times in a row.  that I would ALWAYS want to have my kids working right along with me in the kitchen -- I mean, who cares if things get messy?  I'll just clean them up when my scheduled house straightening rolls around.

How do you most need to adjust your expectations and find a way to enjoy this stage of your children’s lives?
I think mostly I need to remember that mothering is what God is using to make me more like Christ.  And, really, isn't that what I want?  Some people I know have much harder things they're going through in order to be changed, and yet I get to spend my days with 2 delightfully curious, energetic boys!  A true blessing!

I need to stop beating myself up over having a pour initial attitude once in a while.  Instead, I'd like to focus on the times when I am able to adjust the attitude, and get it right.  I need to remember that the Lord is using my poor attitudes to grow my children up, too.  How good it is for them to see the right way and wrong way to handle things.  I so badly want to model how to adjust when things don't go our way. And, how to confess when we make mistakes. So hard, yet so necessary!


If you've decided to read along with me, I'd love to hear what you think, either in the comments, or otherwise.  :)