Sunday, March 03, 2013

Desperate, Chapter 6

So, in case you haven't noticed, I've been blogging through this book for the last few weeks.  I'm doing it as part of a "book club" of sorts over at the blogs of the authors: Sarah Mae and Sally Clarkson

In the book club, they're already done with Chapter 9, with Chapter 10 slated for Tuesday.  But, I'm not -- I'm on Chapter 6.  And, if it's ok for me to be that far behind, then it's totally ok for you to be too!  Jump on in.  I'd love to hear what you're thinking about it!!

Chapter 6 -- Lack of Training

I can totally relate with Sarah and Sally, in that I too had very little training on the how-tos of being a "keeper at home."

I have a very sweet, very loving mom.  She did so much for my brother and I growing up.  Both of my parents did.  My dad started working road construction when I was just a baby.  That meant a lot of long hours, and a lot of time spent out of town.  That also meant my mom was essentially a single mom.  (Except, of course, for the extra paychecks!)  They both worked very hard, and sacrificed a lot so that we could have a good education, complete with sports, dance and scouting.

But, one thing I didn't really know I was lacking before I got married, was the training.  I didn't know how to cook.  I often share this story about when I learned how to (or, more accurately, how NOT to) hard boil an egg.

I knew how to cook pasta.  You wait til the water is boiling, dump the pasta in, and the set a timer and drain.  Simple enough.  So, how do you hard boil an egg?  Wait for the water to boil, put the egg in, and set a timer.  Easy peasey.  In case you don't know where this is going, I'll go ahead and tell you -- the egg explodes.  :)  There, now I've trained you!  Put the egg in before the water gets hot.

I also didn't know how to clean.  My poor mom would work all day, run us around to our activities all evening, and then clean -- when?  I can't remember.  I know she did it.  But, I was very rarely apart of it.

None of this is meant to shame my parents.  In fact, if anything, it's meant to shed light on my sin.  I've spent a long time making excuses about what I've never been trained to do, instead of just availing myself of the training that is available.

And, that's exactly what Chapter 6 is about.  Sarah Mae says at one point in the chapter, "I have a will and a healthy body and mind that give me no excuse for choosing not to train and discipline my children...and myself."  Talk about summing it all up.  I'm without excuse!

That's one thing I learned from this chapter that I hope to apply to my life.

Another quote that was so good, I'm not sure where to cut it off.  I'll just give the whole thing!

Feeling condemned for not getting it all done can be an immediate source of depression for many women.  We all assume that others can do it better than we can, and also assume it must come naturally to some women.  As I have surveyed the man women I have known in every stage of life, it seems to me that housework is always an overwhelming challenge, regardless of personality.

So nice to hear!  I've definitely assumed those things, and it's glad to be reminded that I'm not alone in the struggles.  Sally goes on to give a solution.  She says, "God has taught me that I need to decide to accept the work as a normal part of life and not struggle with it."

In addition to these things -- that my children and I are teachable, and that we will always have housework with us, Sally urges us young moms to recognize that in general, relationships need to trump work.  A nice reminder that my two sweet, messy boys are not the distraction.  The laundry is the distraction.  The very central reason for doing the laundry (which does eventually need to be done), and all other housework, is to make a comfortable training training ground for my men.  When I'm not stopping to love them, to train them, to correct them -- I'm kind of missing the point.


So many good things in this chapter, and so many things I want to apply to my life this week.  Pray for me, if you think of it!  :)

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